What Happens When You Marry Your Homie | Why Couples that laugh together last together

Everyone has opinions about what makes a marriage work. Date nights. Love languages. Never go to bed angry. Most of it sounds great on a podcast, until you try to live it. When Jevin and L. Marie Smith sat down with me for the Shaping Freedom podcast, they brought 21 years of marriage, four children, a family brand built on humor and honesty, and a willingness to say the things most couples keep to themselves.

Jevin is a digital creator, actor, DJ, and comedian known for his viral "Embarrassing Dad" pickup videos and the children's book Daddy Loves to Embarrass Me. He plays 45 Cent in the comedy film A Hip Hop Story alongside Cedric the Entertainer, Wayne Brady, and Lil Rel Howery. L. Marie is a digital creator and lifestyle influencer, beloved on the internet as "Temu Janet Jackson" for her Janet Jackson impressions so committed and so wrong that Janet herself has reposted them. Together they've turned ordinary family moments into content that millions of people recognize themselves in.

What came through in our conversation was a picture of what partnership actually looks like when two people decide to keep choosing each other, especially in the seasons that give them every reason to stop.Three things stood out. And they all started with how these two talk to each other.

1. They called the relationship what it is

Jevin and L. Marie met doing a play together in 2004. She was cast as his wife. A year later, she became his wife in real life. But before any of that, there was a moment at a DJ event that set the tone for everything.

L. Marie showed up not knowing if it was a date. Jevin had other women in rotation and was clear about it. He'd learned the hard way that clarity prevents damage. L. Marie told him she found him attractive. No games. No waiting for signals. Jevin said that was the moment everything shifted. 

That directness didn't stop at dating. Twenty-one years in, Jevin is still the one pushing them to talk. And I get it. He grew up in his mother's beauty shop hearing women talk about men who wouldn't communicate. That stuck with him. He decided early he'd never be that guy. L. Marie is wired differently. She grew up in a house where nobody talked at the dinner table, where feelings got handled alone. And she'll tell you she's still learning. She shared something that really stayed with me. She told Jevin recently that something was bothering her, even though every instinct told her to swallow it. 'I just need you to know,' she told him. 'I'm going to get over it. But I do need you to know.' That was the win. Saying it out loud.

They don't communicate the same way. They never have. But they keep showing up to the conversation anyway.

2. The season that almost broke them built everything that came after

In 2007, Jevin couldn't find work. L. Marie was pregnant with their third child. They were getting eviction notices and things felt dire.

L. Marie went into a Target, locked herself in the bathroom, and cried. A stranger waited outside the door and told her, "In three months, your life will not look like this."

She walked through the store anyway, laying her hands on things for her children she couldn't afford, praying over every one. She and Jevin never told a soul what they were going through. But within 30 days, people in their lives started showing up. Thousands of dollars arrived through priority mail. Boxes of baby clothes showed up at the door. L. Marie calls it what it was: God moving on someone's heart before anyone even knew to ask.

They lived with Jevin's mother. Then an extended stay hotel. That, they both say, was one of the best periods of their lives. Breakfast was made. Someone cleaned the room. L. Marie could just be a mom.

On May 27, 2008, they moved back to LA. Two days later, Jevin won a game show. The way he sees it, that's how faith works. You take the step before you can see where your foot is going to land. Once we are willing to walk, the path gets built under our feet.

3. Support the vision before you can see it

L. Marie didn't sugarcoat what it's like being married to Jevin. "Being married to this guy has been scary," she said, laughing. He leaps into every new venture with both feet. She holds her breath and prays it works. That's been the rhythm for two decades.

When he wasn't sure about stand-up comedy, she pushed him into it. People called it gold. When the embarrassing pickup videos started going viral within 24 hours, she was right there. When the family started booking national commercials for Hyundai, T-Mobile, and Burlington, it was because they'd been building together long before anyone was watching.

"I've learned that ironically, somehow, by the grace of God, the parachute does open," L. Marie said.

And Jevin named what makes the difference: "When she pushes me or believes in me, I'm like, yo, I could do anything."

Their advice for couples who want to build together? L. Marie kept it simple: "If your partner has a vision, just try."

"People have the wrong perception of marriage," Jevin said. "You just think, oh, the old ball and chain or whatever. And I'm like, no, this is my homie."

TL;DR:

• Be clear before it gets complicated. Clarity in a relationship is the thing that keeps small misunderstandings from becoming mountains. Twenty-one years of marriage started with two people who told each other the truth before they even had a reason to.
  

• The hardest season carries the deepest lessons. Eviction notices, an empty bank account, and a baby on the way. That was 2007. Everything they've built since traces back to what they survived together.
  

• Back your partner's dream before the results show up. That's what trust looks like in a marriage. You say yes, you show up, and you figure the rest out together.

Learn More:

• Follow Jevin "Wealthy Jev" Smith at @wealthy_jev on Instagram and @wealthyjev on TikTok to watch a father turn school pickups into the most embarrassing, joyful content on the internet.
  

• Follow L. Marie Smith at @lmariewealthy on Instagram for the Temu Janet Jackson content that Janet herself reposted, and proof that the best creative partnerships start at home.
  

• Check out A Hip Hop Story and grab Daddy Loves to Embarrass Meon Amazon for the children in your life who already know what it's like to have a parent with zero chill.
  

• Listen to the full Shaping Freedom episode and hear what 21 years of love, laughter, and choosing each other actually sounds like.